Friday, October 31, 2008

Scary Man in My Car

A couple of nights ago, I was walking to my car (which was parked in a lot at 11th and Washington). After opening the door and half-plopping into the seat, a scary old black man joined me. He decided it'd be okay to try to get in the car with me, telling me to scoot over. This really freaked me out. He had wedged himself between me and the door, making it impossible for me to close it. He said "you're really pretty" and tried to touch my face. I told him to get the eff away to which he replied "I got lotsa sisters and I got a mama I ain't tryin ta hurt you. Now just come shoot a game of pool with me." I was still freaked out and yelled again for him to get the eff away. He then said, "okay baby girl okay I hear you but can I at least get your number?" I think this actually made me laugh in a half uncomfortable, half genuinely amused way. This guy was basically as old as Ray Charles in those early 90s Pepsi commercials (Remember? Spotlighted in Rookie of the Year when Henry left the shoot to go build a boat with his friends?) and seemed kind of bummish. He clearly had no game, sneaking around trying to hop into my car at 2 a.m. I give him some credit for being sneaky...he came out of nowhere. Anyway, after he asked for my number I said "No...I need to drive home now...please leave me alone." He said "Okay I leave you alone but why can't I have yo number?" Instead of screaming at the top of my lungs " BECAUSE YOU'RE A PSYCO HOMELESS MAN WHO JUMPED IN MY CAR" or telling him simply "old black men aren't really my type" I just said "sorry I have a boyfriend." He looked embarrassed, immediately removed himself from my vehicle and stated "well I do apologize. He must be da most blessed man in da world," and casually walked away.

So, what did I learn from this tramautic/awkward/unexpected experience? First, I will never ever no matter what the circimstances may be walk to my car alone downtown late at night again. Second, kind of like the vampires in True Blood, it's possible for people to sneak up on me out of nowhere. And third, I guess I learned that not all people who try to get in my car late at night want to kill me or rob me or steal my car. Or if that's not true, maybe saying I have a boyfriend deters them for some reason. Last but not least, I think I was just really really lucky and hope I'm never in that situation again.


Amy said...

i love you :(

Kimberly said...

Oh. My. God. I'm glad you're not raped! also, I LOVE the Rookie of the Year reference, pure genius.

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